Title- Possess My Soul
Series- Possess Saga # 5
By- J.A. Howell
Publication Date- May 15th, 2014
“Being half-fae I had the ability to sense others' impending deaths. Anomalies. Deaths that didn't have to happen. Sometimes, if I had enough time to get to them, I could stop their deaths. But I never imagined I'd see my own.”
With only a week to go before she gives birth to her daughter Emma, Harley Faye Finley chooses to make the ultimate sacrifice. Trade her life for that of her daughter’s. When the time comes, she’s ready for the inevitable.
But something goes wrong.
But someone…or something else is in there with her.
As this unknown, malevolent force fights for control, Harley finds herself a prisoner in her own body, and those she loves are now in mortal danger. Will she, Nolan, or anybody else be able to stop it before it’s too late?
Or will the Harley they know and love be lost to them forever?
When we reached the hospital, it was chaos. There were ambulances, police, and news vehicles crowding the Emergency entrance. I tried to hear what was going on, but we weren’t close enough. None of it mattered anyway. I’d be gone soon.
“I’m a couple days early, but I already called the doctor. We don’t need to go in that way.” I assured Nolan. He eyed the ER, then turned the truck around to the main entrance and pulled up in front of the glass doors. He handed the keys to the valet, thanking them before helping me out.
“You called everyone else, right?” I looked up at him as he eased me into a wheelchair. “I want them to be here for yo—I want them to be here when Emma comes.”
Nolan gave me a questioning look but nodded. “Yes, I called them. Aggie is rounding up the troops as we speak.”
“Good.” I felt a little more at ease at that thought. Of everyone that had been there with Nolan when something went wrong, I trusted Aggie the most. I was sure she could help Nolan through this too.
“Harley! Ya okay? Is it another one?” Nolan stopped and kneeled in front of me. I was doubled over, my hand gripping the side of the wheelchair. I could only nod, letting out puffs of breath. A couple nurses were already rushing to our side, seeing me in active labor.
“Come on, mommy. Let’s get you into a room.” The woman’s chipper tone stung me.
Mommy. I won’t get the chance to be her mommy.
Twenty minutes later we were settled into a room in the maternity ward and my contractions were coming quicker and stronger than before.
“My, first time moms usually are sitting and waiting for hours for anything to happen. You’re just moving right along, aren’t you?” The nurse shook her head after she checked my dilation. “Hope your doctor gets here before the baby does.” She joked but I gave Nolan a nervous look.
He kissed my forehead and came closer to the side of the bed. “It’ll be okay, love.”
I squeezed my eyes shut. Another wave of contractions hit me hard. My fingers gripped the bed railings and I tried to hold back the scream forcing its way up.
“Breathe, baby, breathe.” Nolan’s hand caressed my back and I let out a slow breath, tears stinging my eyes.
“I’m scared.” I couldn’t help the pitiful tone in which the words came out when the contraction finally subsided. Nolan leaned over me as I laid back. He brushed the strands from my face that were stuck in place from the sweat coating my forehead.
“Yer doin’ good. Yer almost there, love, and I’ll be right here the whole time.”
I nodded, pressing my forehead to his and his fingers intertwined with mine. I didn’t want him to be here. I didn’t want him to watch me die. But it was a comfort to know I wouldn’t be alone. I gave his large hand a squeeze, savoring the feel of it and the way mine fit in it so perfectly. God, I didn’t want to let go.
I won’t. Not until I have to.
The doctor came into the room a couple minutes later, just as another wave of contractions subsided.
“Well, Mrs. Finley, you’re ready to go. Next contraction, I want you to push, got it?”
I nodded, still clutching Nolan’s hand as another one hit.
“Alright, here we go. Push!”
I let out a pitiful whimper at the pressure building within me, but pushed with everything I could.
“Alright, just a couple more pushes, Harley. You’ve got this.”
I already felt my body weakening, but I did what I was supposed to. Just how the vision went. I pushed again and the world blurred around me.
“Harley, I can see her head! You’re almost there.” Nolan’s voice was filled with joy, and a tear ran down my cheek. I didn’t want to leave him, but at least he’d have her. Our baby girl.
“Okay, one more push.” The doctor’s voice was barely distinguishable, but I already knew what I had to do.
“I’ll always love you, Nolan.” My words slurred together and I gave his hand one last squeeze. With everything I had left, I pushed. I heard Emma’s wailing just before the lights faded overhead and my hand slipped out of his.
I took my time heading back to the apartment, making my rounds downstairs to ensure everything was business as usual in the pub. I would have loved to bury myself in work, but I knew better. It probably hadn’t been the best idea to leave Harley alone either given her erratic behavior—even if she had seemed closer to her old self at the doctor’s this morning. Close, but still not right, I thought.
When I walked into the apartment it was silent and still. I glanced toward the bedroom to find her fast asleep, long wavy hair spilling over her face. She slept on her side with one arm under her pillow, the other hanging off the bed. With a tired sigh I walked into the bedroom, carefully placing her dangling arm back on the mattress and pushing a gleaming black strand back from her face. Her long dark lashes twitched against her bronzed skin as she dreamt, and I sank down next to her, my hand gently stroking her hip.
“Christ, Harley. I wish I knew what’s goin’ on inside ya.” I whispered in the quiet room, not wishing to wake her. “Did I do this ta ya? Ya’ve been through so much and then suddenly the baby and the wedding...maybe it was too much too soon. God, I wish ya could tell me something. I wish I could make ya better again. Make ya happy again.”
My throat tightened with the last words and I fell silent once more, watching the subtle twitches and movements as she dreamt. Unaware of my presence, her chest rose and fell, deep in the comfort of sleep. She looked more than ever like my Harley. I swallowed hard, sliding my hand off her side and resting it over her hand. “Ya’ve no idea the depths of my love fer ya. Yer my heart, the very soul of my being.” I squeezed her slender hand in mine but as my grip relaxed, hers suddenly tightened.
“Nolan?” Her voice came out in a strangled whimper, barely audible.
“Harley?” I held onto her hand and she squeezed mine harder.
“Nolan?!” Her lips trembled with the rise in her voice and a few tears rolled down from the corner of her eyes, though they remained shut.
“I’m here, baby, what is it?”
“I’m trapped, Nolan. I can’t get out!” More tears came and I could see the twitching movement beneath her lids. I touched her cheek, wiping away the tears as they trailed down the valley between her nose and cheek.
“Shh, it’s just a dream. Yer fine. I’m right here.”
“I can’t get out! It’s dark and cold here! Please, Nolan. He keeps hurting me.” Her nails dug into the back of my hand, pain bleeding into her voice.
“Who, Harley? Yer asleep. Nobody’s here but me. Wake up.” I shook her gently but it did nothing to pull her out of it. Her back arched and she gasped, more tears wetting her thick lashes.
“He’s so strong now. I can’t keep fighting! Please, Nolan. I’m trapped.”
“Baby, wake up, it’s just a nightmare.” I shook her with a little more force and her hand trembled in mine.
“I can’t wake up! He’s keeping me here, forcing me down. It hurts! It hurts so bad. He’s so strong. He’ll make me do things! Please! I don’t want to do them!” Her whole body shook and she curled toward me, sobbing in her sleep. Anger flickered inside me at the thought of her ex. After what he put her through, after he tried to kill her and nearly succeeded, there had been many times I’d had to wake her from nightmares of him, comforting her and bringing her back to the present. But it hadn’t happened in a long time.
“Baby, ya need ta wake up. He’s gone, remember?” I pried my hand from hers and shook her once more before pulling her into my arms and patting her cheek. “Jackson’s dead. He won’t hurt you again.”
“No. Not him!” Her bottom lip trembled and a hand flew up, gripping mine once more.
“Then who?” I asked. She didn’t answer, didn’t open her eyes as I cradled her against me. “Wake up, love. Tell me what’s wrong.”
I shook her again and her eyes fluttered open, startled and scared as she stared up at me. “Who, baby? Who’s hurtin’ ya?”
Her body relaxed and her frightened blue eyes dulled suddenly as she looked away from me. The anguish and pain in her features smoothed away and she sat up, untangling herself from my arms.
“Harley?” I tried to pull her back to me but she stood and started for the bathroom, barely glancing over her shoulder.
“Sorry, darling. It was just a bad dream.”
Possess My Soul got a lot darker than the rest of the series...and as a result so did the playlist for it. There is also a lot of action in this book so there is a lot of songs with heavy thumping beats on here as well, like Rammstein. Nightwish and Apocalyptica were really great to write to especially with all the paranormal elements. Imagine Dragons just fit Lucas’ character really well.
1- Flesh and Blood- Johnny Cash
2- Bye Bye Beautiful- Nightwish
3- Scaretale- Nightwish
4- Fake Angels- Lovedrug
5- Feed The Fire- Combichrist
6- Retaliate- VNV Nation
7- Storytime- Nightwish
8- Bodies- Drowning Pool (A good song for when shit hits the fan)
9- The Widow- The Mars Volta
10- End Of Me- Apocalyptica
11- Radioactive-Imagine Dragons
12- Du Hast- Rammstein
13- I Don’t Care- Apocalyptica
14- Demons- Imagine Dragons
15- Bleeding Out- Imagine Dragons
16- Not Strong Enough- Apocalyptica
17- Seven Devils- Florence + The Machine
18- Breathe Me- Sia
19- Don’t Bring Me Down- Sia
20- All I See- Lydia
21- Hospital- Lydia
22- Arabesque- Nightwish
23- Last Ride Of The Day- Nightwish
24- Save Yourself- Stabbing Westward (I named a chapter after this song)
25-Come Little Children- Erutan (One of the prettiest and creepiest songs)
26- Wild Horses- The Sundays (Serious Nolan Feels)
27- Never Tear Us Apart -INXS
J.A Howell is an office drone by day, and a writer by night. Her love of writing took off when she was eleven years old and decided to fill a composition notebook with stories to read to her friends. Many years (and notebooks) later, not much has changed. She still loves writing and sharing her works with others. When she isn’t writing, she can often be found trying her hand at whatever artistic pursuit strikes her fancy. J.A. Howell resides in Apopka, FL with her husband and their menagerie of animal children.